Future Film Round-up

- Ang Lee is the latest director signed to direct Life of Pi, based on the award-winning Canadian novel. Others attached in the past have include M. Night Shyamalan, Alfonso Cuaron, and Jean-Pierre Jeunet.
- Dan Aykroyd mentioned at a House of Blues event that Ghostbusters 3 should start filming late this Fall.
- The new Woody Allen film I mentioned earlier has added Naomi Watts and Freida Pinto to its cast.
- Gore Verbinski will be directing a new version of Clue, based on the board game.
- The fourth film from Adam McKay and Will Ferrell (Anchorman, Talladega Nights, and Step Brothers) is called B Team, and co-stars Mark Wahlberg.
- Matt Damon will star in The Adjustment Bureau, based on the short story by Philip K. Dick (Blade Runner, Total Recall, A Scanner Darkley).
- Sherlock Holmes, directed by Guy Rotchie and starring Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law, will now open this Christmas Day
- There is going to be a live action/CGI combo version (think Alvin & the Chipmunks) of Yogi Bear.
- The Green Hornet, written by Seth Rogan and Evan Goldberg and starring Rogan now has Michel Gondry as its director.
- Sean Penn is in talks to play Joe Wilson in Fair Game, the story of Valerie Plame who was outed as a CIA operative by the media/the Bush Administration (depending on how you want to look at it). Naomi Watts is already signed as Valerie Plame, and Doug Lima is directing.

Upcoming movies in the next week

A few goodies in this the last week of February, but not much from Hollywood


Wednesday

The Exiles




Friday

Virtual JFK
This documentary, playing at the Mayfair, postulates what would have happened in Vietnam has John Kennedy not been assassinated.




Master With Cracked Fingers
The Mayfair begins their promised Kung Fu Fridays with this, Jackie Chan’s debut film. Couldn’t find a trailer, but here’s the dominos sequence.




Che
This was one of the most anticipated films of 2008 for me, so it’s too bad it took almost until March 2009 to arrive here in Ottawa. No matter. Split into two parts, Part One opens Friday at the Mayfair, with Part Two opening on the 11th of March. For March 11th and 12th, the Mayfair will be showing both parts back to back for a discounted price, if you can handle 4 ½ hours of Che at once (with trailers and an intermission, it’ll be about 5 hours, actually).




Necessities of Life
This film starring the lead actor from Atarjanuat: The Fast Runner, was Canada’s entry for the Academy Award for best Foreign Language Film, and made the 9 film shortlist, but sadly was not nominated. I’ve seen the trailer many times at the Bytowne, but couldn’t find it on Youtube.
At the Bytowne.


Jonas Brothers: the 3D Experience
It doesn’t get more pure than this, kiddies. In 3D at Silvercity.


Street Fighter
If it doesn’t have Van Damme and Raul Julia, fuck it.




Saturday

Ghoulies
Saturday Night Sinema, at the Mayfair. Free for members.




Sunday

Spartacus
Stanley Kubrick’s least Kubrick-esque film, this is the first of series of matinee epics in March at the Mayfair. Starring Kirk Douglas in a haircut no Roman gladiator would have had. I am Spartacus!




Monday

The Night of the Hunter
One of the greatest thrillers ever made, this Robert Mitchum classic plays at the Bytowne. It’s the one where Mitchum has LOVE and HATE tattooed on his knuckles.




NEXT WEEK: The Longest Comic Book Movie EVER!!!! The Watchmen, all 2 hours and 40 minutes of it. Wear something comfortable.

Oscars - Yesterday and Tomorrow

Slumdog Millionaire was the big winner last night, taking home 8 awards, including Picture, Director, and Screenplay. Steph and I both got 15 of 24 correct.

Now 2009 really begins. The first big movie of the year is The Watchmen, which opens on March 6th (all 2 hours and 40 minutes of it - longest comic book movie ever).

Here are some very early picks for next year; not actual predictions of what might win, or even be nominated, but what I'm personally looking forward to. However, I will predict that at least 3 of these picks WILL be nominated.

Picture: Public Enemies
Director: Michael Mann, Public Enemies
Actor: Adam Sandler, Funny People
Actress: Hilary Swank, Amelia
Supporting Actor: Max Von Sydow, Shutter Island
Supporting Actress: Saoirse Ronan, The Lovely Bones
Original Screenplay: Inglorious Basterds (written by Quentin Tarantino)
Adapted Screenplay: Shutter Island (written for the screen by Laeta Kalogridis)
Editing: The Watchmen
Cinematography: Public Enemies
Art Direction: Sherlock Holmes
Costumes: A Serious Man
Make-up: Wolfman
Visual Effects: Avatar
Sound Editing: Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen
Sound Mixing: Taking Woodstock
Original Score: The Road (by Nick Cave and Warren Ellis)
Animated Film: Fantastic Mr. Fox (by Wes Anderson)
Foreign Language Film: Broken Embraces (by Pedro Almodovar)
Documentary Film: Freakanomics (by Alex Gibney)


These are very out-of-left-field picks, because it's just impossible to know. To illustrate that best, just remember that at this point last year, it was anticipated that Slumdog Millionaire would be released Straight-To-DVD.

Will's Oscar Picks

The Oscars start in about 90 minutes ... here are my predictions, and personal choices:

Picture
will win: Slumdog Millionaire
should win: Milk

Director
will: Danny Boyle, Slumdog
should: Gus Van Sant, Milk

Actor
will: Mickey Rourke, The Wrestler
should: same

Actress
will: Kate Winslet, The Reader
should: Meryl Streep, Doubt

Supporting Actor
will: Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight
should: same

Supporting Actress
will: Penelope Cruz, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
should: Viola Davis, Doubt

Original Screenplay
will: Wall-E
should: Milk

Adapted Screenplay
will: Slumdog Millionaire
should: Doubt

Editing
will: Slumdog Millionaire
should: The Dark Knight

Cinematography
will: Slumdog Millionaire
should: The Dark Knight

Art Direction
will: The Dark Knight
should: same

Costumes
will: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
should: Milk

Make-up
will: Benjamin Button
should: Hellboy II

Visual Effects
will: Benjamin Button
should: Iron Man

Sound Editing
will: The Dark Knight
should: same

Sound Mixing
will: Slumdog
should: Wall-E

Score
will: Slumdog Millionaire
should: Defiance

Song
will: Down To Earth, from Wall-E
should: same

Animated Feature
will: Wall-E
should: same

Foreign
will: Waltz With Bashir
should: same (though only 2 of the 5 have opened in Ottawa so far)

Documentary Feature
will: Man On Wire
should: Encounters at the End of the World

Documentary Short
will: The Witness
should: haven't seen any

Live Action Short
will: Auf Der Strecke
should: haven't seen any

Animated Short
will: Presto
should: same (only one I've seen, but a very funny little film)

Upcoming Movies This Week

The February movie drought continues, though as always, there's a couple decent entries at the Mayfair and Bytowne


Wednesday

Made in Jamaica
(Reggae doc, at the Mayfair)




Thursday

Africa Unite
(Bob Marley doc, at the Mayfair)




Friday

Stepping Razor: Red X
(Peter Tosh doc, at the Mayfair ... are you noticing a theme here?)




My Bloody Valentine
(the original, midnight at the Mayfair)




Stuck
(Mayfair)




In The Moment
(Bytowne)




Stone of Destiny
(everywhere)




Fired Up
(everywhere)




Saturday

Metropolis
(Mayfair, with LIVE score featuring members of the Hilotrons)




Re-Animator(Mayfair)




Sunday

Louise Bourgeois: The Spider, The Mistress, And The Tangerine
(Bytowne)


81st Annual Academy Awards- free for Mayfair and Saw Gallery memebers, at the Mayfair. There is a liquor license for this event.




Have fun!

Muppets!!!!!

The Muppet Movie (1979)
and
The Great Muppet Caper (1981)

Monday was Family Day here in Ontario, and the Mayfair played the first two theatrical Muppet movies for people to bring their kids to. Neither Gary nor Steph and I have kids, but we went and checked them out anyway.

The Muppet Movie played first, and the film has held up remarkably well (though the physical "film" has definitely not). The film is a sort of "origin story" showing how the Muppets all found each other, filled with lots of cameos including Richard Pryor, Bob Hope, and the late puppeteer Edgar Bergen. The kids in the crowd loved all the songs (including the Oscar-nominated Rainbow Connection). The one kid behind me even made me reconsider my thoughts on what Gonzo is.

after The Muppet Movie came The Great Muppet Caper, which unfortunately isn't as strong a film. Though teh film is still filled with songs, I found that the jokes weren't as clever, and that the plot didn't really make sense, even by Muppet standards. For one thing, I couldn't figure out why it was set in England, since none of the Muppets (and only one of the main human characters) had a British accent. The print of this film was in better shape, however.

I Want 100 Nazi Scalps!

Were The Reader, Defiance, and Valyrie not enough for you this year? Fear not, this August, the 7th film from Quentin Tarantino ...

Inglorious Basterds

Future Film Round-up

- Saturday Night Live Alums Chris Rock, Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider and David Spade are teaming up for a new comedy. All that’s missing is Chris Farley, so instead we get … Kevin James.

- There will be a third Star Trek trailer, with new footage, in front of The Watchmen on March 6th.

- Woody Allen continues his film-a-year pace (seriously, the guy is in his 70s and still going, strongly, in my opinion). After this summer’s Whatever Works, with Larry David and Evan Rachel Wood, Woody is heading back to London for an untitled film starring Josh Brolin and Anthony Hopkins. Due in 2010.

- Screenwriter Tony Kushner thinks Spielberg’s Lincoln (which Kushner co-wrote) may be out by Christmas.

- Steven Soderbergh has signed on to direct Moneyball, based on the story of the Oakland A’s general manager, Billy Beane, who developed a new way of rating baseball players, which led to Oakland fielding a highly competitive team, yet somehow couldn’t seem to have taught J.P. Ricciardi a damn thing.

Upcoming movies in the next week

Hey all, this weekend is of course Valentine's Day, so if you're looking to take that special someone to a movie, here are some choices. Monday is also Family Day, and with not much open, you might want to check out a film then, and there are a few options. There's not much in the way of mainstream Hollywood fare, and won't be until The Watchmen on March 6th, but that's why we have the Bytowne and the Mayfair.


Wednesday

9 to 5 Days in Porn plays Wednesday at the Mayfair. It’s a documentary about the behind the scenes lives of the relatively ordinary people who happen to make a living by acting in pornography. Featuring Sasha Grey, among others. Without pissing anyone off, I didn’t want to post a trailer for this one, sorry.


Friday

Flicker
This documentary is playing at the Mayfair, about a 60’s invention called the dream machine, which is a rotating cylinder with lights inside and cut-outs. You stare into it and supposedly it provokes visions. At the Mayfair they have one running right now. I tried it (sans drugs) on Monday night and I didn’t get anything but a headache. No trailer to be found.


Friday the 13th

Apropos for the date comes the Michael Bay-produced remake of the slasher classic. Kids go back to Camp Crystal Lake, probably get naked, and get killed.




Friday the 13th
Now if you’re someone who thinks remakes are bullshit, check out the orginal at Midnight at the Mayfair. Kevin Bacon is among the unlucky young souls.




Rumba
At the Bytowne opening this Friday, this is the story of a couple of elementary school teachers who compete in rumba contests, only to to get into a serious car accident where both acquire serious handicaps. Supposedly a comedy.




Bienvenue Chez Les Ch’tis
Also at the Bytowne is this film, the most successful French film of all time. The trailer looks stupid.




Confessions of a Shopaholic
Is there a less offensive film in our current recession?




The International
This is the latest film from Tom Tykwer, director of Run, Lola, Run. Starring Clive Owen and Naomi Watts, it’s about murder and conspiracy involving international banking.




Saturday

Smokey and the Bandit
I can’t think of a better way to tell someone you love them then to take them to see this car chase classic with Sally Field … and of course, Burton Leon Reynolds Jr. At the Mayfair




Henry & June
Last month the Mayfair played Showgirls, the highest grossing NC17 film of all time. This Valentine’s Day, they are playing Henry & June, the very first NC17 film. It’s the story of Anais Nin encountering Henry Miller and his wife.




Emmanuelle
If, like me, you used to pretend to watch Saturday Night Live when you were younger, you’ll probably be familiar with this. Enough said. Midnight Valentine’s, at the Mayfair.




Sunday

Malcolm X
One of the great American epics of the 1990s, this is one of Spike Lee’s masterpiece, and Denzel Washington’s greatest performance. Plays Sunday afternoon at the Mayfair. If you have a shift that day, don’t worry, Spike Lee himself said you should skip work or school to see this film.
(Note, that only applies if you’re black.)




Monday – FAMILY DAY

E.T. the Extraterrestrial
The Mayfair is running movies all day on Family Day, so unless you work for the Federal Government, you can go see some classic films. First up is a FREE screening of Steven Spielberg’s classic E.T. See Drew Barrymore pre-coke addiction … and no one else that regularly works.




The Muppet Movie
Next up is the original Muppet movie, where the Muppets have to make their way to Hollywood, which of course means what? CAMEOS! CAMEOS FOR EVERYONE!




The Great Muppet Caper
The Muppet fun continues when the Muppets get accused of a diamond heist. Fear not, THERE ARE MORE CAMEOS!




The Times of Harvey Milk
Winner of the 1984 Oscar for Best Documentary, this is the film that inspired Milk, also still in theatres. Monday night at the Mayfair, after all the kids leave.




The Motorcycle Diaries
With Che hitting theatres later this month, the Bytowne is playing this about about the early adventures of Che Guevera, which shaped his ideologies that led him to the Cuban revolution.

Don't Fuck With The Jews

Defiance
2008, dir. Edward Zwick. 2 hours 17 minutes
stars Daniel Craig, Liev Schreiber, Jamie Bell

"Don't Fuck With The Jews"

So says Daniel Craig's character in Munich, from 2005. Three years later, Craig returns as a vengeful Jew in Defiance, the latest earnest action flick from Edward Zwick, director of Glory, Legends of the Fall, and The Last Samurai. Defiance is the true story of the Bielski brothers of Belarus, who, after the Nazis have come and murdered their parents, escape to the woods to hide, only to be followed by a handful of their fellow villagers. That handful slowly grows to be over a hundred (and in fact, ended up being over a thousand), and they form a small community in the forest, building huts out of mud and trees, and stealing food from nearby farms.

Craig plays Tuvia Bielski, the oldest brother, who becomes commander of the community, trying to straddle the rather thin line between survival and humanity. Liev Schreiber is Zus Bielski, who is a bit more hot-headed, and eventually tires of following orders from his brother and joins up with the Russian partisans. Jamie Bell is Asael Bielski, on the cusp of adulthood and trying to emulate a bit of both of his older brothers (there is a fourth, youngest Bielski, but I don't think the kid had any actual lines in the movie).

Defiance is the latest in a line of Nazi-related movies in the past year, but it is by far the most Hollywood of them all (yes, even more so than Valkyrie). The film, especially in the first half, is filled almost constantly with jokes, and although that may not be a bad thing for the actual characters, I found that it took away from the gravity of the situation. The actors all speak with thick accents of varying believability, and yet sometimes the film switches to Russian with English subtitles. I think the parts spoken in English are what would have been spoken in Yiddish in reality, but I'm not sure, and I found it confusing. Lastly, although the action was exciting, I found that the sequence of events was so cliched that it was difficult to believe in it, whether it happened that way or not.

Overall, a decent action flick, but don't expect any depth near the level of something like Schindler's List.

3 stars

PS. For some reason, neither Microsoft Word nor Excel will let me spell Liev ... they switch it automatically to Live, and I cannot undo it. Does anyone know how to fix that.

You Can't Take That Gun Across The Cornwall Bridge

Frozen River
2008, dir. Courtney Hunt. 1 hour 37 minutes
stars Melissa Leo, Misty Upham, Charlie McDermott

I read somewhere once that between 75 and 80% of Canadians live within 100 km of the United States border. Here in Ottawa, just across the nearest border at the Cornwall bridge are towns like Ogdensburg, Malone, and the setting of the film Frozen River, Massena. Every now and then my parents or grandparents would take us cross border shopping, and we'd drive through this empty, destitute landscape of up upstate New York and they'd talk about how poor it was, as poor as the Deep South, but no one in the media ever seemed to talk about it.

That poverty and destituteness is on display here in Frozen River, the Sundance Film Festival winning and Academy Award nominated debut film from Courtney Hunt. Melissa Leo plays Ray, and mother of two and wife of an unseen gambling addict, who, just before the film opens has taken off with the down payment for their new mobile home, their double wide with wall-to-wall carpeting and a jacuzzi tub in the bathroom. Ray is only pulling part-time hours at a local dollar store (one I'm 105% sure my grandmother has been in), and is hoping for a managerial promotion that is clearly never coming, and while searching for her husband, encounters a young Mohawk woman, Lila, and eventually the two end up in a small people smuggling operation. They make a few thousand dollars, almost enough to accomplish their respective goals, and they decide to make one last run ... and we all know how that works.

Frozen River works very well on two levels. It is at once a drama about a single-in-all-but-name mother trying to get her kids into a nicer house that's insulated properly so the pipes won't freeze, and also as a taught suspense thriller during the smuggling sequences. I would defy any of you to drive a car across a frozen outlet of the St. Lawrence River without a giant lump in your throat. It also offers a brief glimpse about how the laws and rules work a bit differently on a Mohawk (or probably any kind of native) reserve, and how those differences isolates natives and whites from each other. Melissa Leo gives a reserved yet intense performance, the kind of performance that doesn't always get notice. Luckily, Leo has earned a well-deserved Oscar nomination for her work here.

Frozen River is a great film, and if you live around Eastern Ontario, you'll probably recognize some of the locations.

4 stars

Seen at the Mayfair by myself on Monday night, where I sat in their very comfortable leather couches.

Is It Better To Shoot Or Pray?

Waltz With Bashir
2008, dir. Ari Folman. 1 hour 27 minutes

There are four Academy Awards for full length movies (Best Picture, Best Animated Film, Best Foreign Film, and Best Documentary Film), and to the best of my knowledge, Waltz With Bashir is the first film eligible for all four.

Waltz With Bashir is a documentary about Israel's war with Lebanon and a particular massacre that occurred there in the 1980s. It is comprised of interviews with actual fellow combatants of director Folman, which were then rotoscoped (I think) into an animated style to match the animated re-enactments of their experiences, thoughts, dreams, and night mares. The animation allows the film to take on a type of hyper-reality, even in some of the interview scenes, which are really no different than had they been simply shot as real footage. At the very end of the film, at an important point in Folman's quest for information about his past, the film switches over to graphic real footage, to show the audience that these events were not cartoons at all, but very very real.

Like The Class, Waltz With Bashir is also nominated for the Best Foreign Film Oscar, and I think it will probably win. Highly recommended, though at times very graphic.

4 stars

Seen at the Bytowne Sunday night with Steph.

I Didn't Call You a Skank, I Said You Acted Like A Skank

The Class
2008, dir. Laurent Cantet.
2 hours 8 minutes

At the 2008 Cannes Film Festival, the Palme D'Or winner was the French film The Class, and I have to be honest, I don't understand what the jury was thinking, because the film is one of the most derivative and cliched I've seen in a long time.

The Class is the story of a French teacher in an innercity Parisian school, who has a class full of delinquents who don't have much hope in life, yet show some promise. In the end some of them learn things, and a few don't make it. They talk back, he tries to reach them in other ways, etc etc etc. Honestly, I've seen this all before. It's equal parts Dangerous Minds, Stand and Deliver, and Dead Poets Society. Supposedly the difference is that this film is based on the autobiography of an actual teacher, and that actual teacher is cast as himself, but I didn't care, because he's no different than any other actor (maybe that's how he really is).

I found one aspect interesting, though it's fairly irrelevant to my views on the film; I am fluent in French, and I could understand without the subtitles everything the teacher said, and everything the other adults said, and most of what the students would say to the teacher or other adults in a one on one situation ... BUT, I could not understand one word of what the students were saying when they were in group situations, specifically in class.

The Class is nominated for the Best Foreign Film Oscar this year, and a lot of people seem to think it's great, but honestly, it was derivative crap, and putting a French aspect on something doesn't make it less crappy, it just makes it more annoying.

1 star.

Seen at the Bytowne on Saturday night with Steph, who hated it just as much.

Screening # 5: Burn After Reading

Burn After Reading
2008, 1 hour 33 minutes

Following their Oscar success with No Country For Old Men, the Coen brothers made Burn After Reading, a pretty hilarious screwball comedy about spies, politicians, and personal trainers in Washington D.C.

The film stars George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Frances McDormand, Richard Jenkins, Tilda Swinton, and John Malkovich, all of whom, incidently, have won or have been nominated for Academy Awards. Plus, it's on Blu-Ray, 1080p High Definition, sharp as a knife, crisp as a fresh apple. Oh yeah, mothafucka.

This Sunday afternoon, February 8th, at 3 pm. Will's apartment.

Future Film Round-up

- West Wing creator Aaron Sorkin will write and George Clooney will direct and star in The Challenge, about the trial of Osama Bin Ladin’s driver. If it’s successful, expect a sequel about Bin Ladin’s manicurist.
- John carpenter is coming back to theatres with The Ward, about a young woman trapped in a mental institution with a malevolent ghost.
- Universal Pictures is remaking Slap Shot. Expect the climax to be an outdoor game, ‘cause that’s the only hockey that Americans will actually watch.
- Spike Lee has purchased the rights to To Hell and Back, about a WWII soldier who goes AWOL and hides in the Burmese jungle, eventually joining an indigenous tribe.
- The Weinstein Company has purchased the rights a biography on the life of Judy Garland.
- Michael Radford, who a few years directed Al Pacino in a film version of The Merchant of Venice, is now making King Lear, starring … Al Pacino.

Upcoming movies in the next week

Sorry folks, but this is notoriously the time of the year when the major studios dump their films they have no hope for, with a smattering of chick flicks/date movies in time for Valentine's Day. Luckily, here in Ottawa, we have the Mayfair and the Bytowne, who can fill your film needs if you don't like the Hollywood offerings.


Wednesday

As the Mayfair will be showing JCVD, for those of you who missed it at the Bytowne in November/December, the theatre will also be showing several older classic Jean-Claude Van Damme flicks, starting with John Woo’s US film debut, Hard Target.




Thursday

Van Damme week continues with Timecop, which features the muscles from Brussels travelling through time. It’s also the only other Mia Sara film I think of other than Ferris Bueller.




Friday

Waltz With Bashir
About war torn Middle East, this is supposedly an animated documentary, however that works. The trailer looks good though. Nominated for Best Foreign Film at the Oscars.




Coraline
More animation, though I can’t tell whether it’s CGI or stop-motion. From the director of The Nightmare Before Christmas.




He’s Just Not That Into You
Based on the non-fiction advice book for women, it’s a romantic comedy, times, like, 14 or something. Cast includes Ginnifer Goodwin, Ben Affleck, Scarlett Johansson, Jennifer Connelly, Drew Barrymore, Justin Long, Bradley Cooper, Jennifer Aniston, Kevin Connelly, and best of all, Kris Kristofferson.




Polytechnique
I honestly didn’t know about this film until I saw it listed on the Cineplex website. It’s story of the infamous massacre at the Ecole Polytechnique in Montreal from the late 1980s. Hopefully, it won’t be exploitative in any way. It’s only playing in Quebec for now, so if you head over to Hull to check it out, be warned that it may not have subtitles.




Push
Like Jumpers, but with telekinesis instead of teleportation. If Chris Evans and Dakota Fanning get it on, I will burn my eyes out.




Pink Panther 2
It would be less offensive if they just shat on Peter Sellers’ grave and were done with it.




Maximum Risk
Worried, weren’t you? Van Damme fun continues at the Mayfair.




Saturday

Double Team
JCVD + Dennis Rodman + Mickey Rourke. The Van Damme fun concludes.




Sunday

Sound of Music
Christopher Plummer’s least favorite film, apparently. Winner of the 1965 Best Picture Oscar. The hills are alive. The Sunday Family Movie at the Mayfair.




Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
Also at the Mayfair is this, the greatest of all the Star Trek films. Rest in Peace, Ricardo Montablan.




Casablanca
Nothing needs to be said for this classic, playing Sunday and Monday at the Bytowne. Instead of the trailer, I posted the Bugs Bunny parody, Carrotblanca.




Tuesday

2046
From director Wong Kar Wai, double billed with his recent release, Ashes of Time Redux.

Remakes Galore! Remakes For Everyone!

Denofgeek posted this article today listing 55 major remake projects in the works:

The most distubring:

- Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes in a remake of Last Tango In Paris.

There's at least 37 reasons why that's disturbing.

The rest

Mom, Get My Toys!

G.I. Joe




Transformers 2